All relationships are different, but most of them are not like the marriages you see on tv where the wife and husband always agree and never have disagreements. In life marriage is a constant struggle. Before you give up on one another you should at least try to salvage your marriage. There is great marriage counseling Sarasota Florida has to offer. If you live in or near Sarasota you may want to try to find a marriage counselor before you give up on each other.
It is important that you like and trust your counselor so do some research before choosing one. Ask friends and family that you know have been to counseling, they may can recommend someone. You can also look on the internet, a lot of patients will leave feed back on what they thought about the counselor.
Once you find one you think you both like then you make an appointment, and be sure to keep that appointment it is very important that you go. Without help from a marriage counselor your marriage is going to fall apart right in front of you and you wont be able to stop it.
You will be asked a lot of personal questions that you may feel uncomfortable answering like questions about your sex life, and your relationship but you have to be honest with your answers or the therapist can't help you. If one of you had an affair it needs to be talked about even if the spouse doesn't know. This is the best place to talk about something like that.
You can feel free to say anything you want to your spouse while in the office, it is actually healthy to be able to say everything you keep in all the time. Your therapist will probably give you some homework to do between visits. Things like write each other a letter telling each other how it makes you feel when they do certain things.
The therapist may ask you to use certain words when expressing your feelings. Instead of yelling and screaming at each other use words like I feel, and it hurts when you do this or that. The way you talk to your spouse makes a big difference in a relationship.
A couple that has been married for twenty years or more didn't get that far by talking ugly to each other or yelling. They probably talk to each other with kindness and respect and they listen to one another when one of them is angry about something.
You do not have to yell to be heard. You can be upset and still be heard without screaming at each other. If you do what the counselor tells you to do while you are at home, you may just be able to salvage the relationship. You will have to work at it but don't you think it is worth working for? You have to remember what made you fall in love in the first place. You want to get to that place again, you want to fall in love with you spouse again and you can do that if you work at it.
It is important that you like and trust your counselor so do some research before choosing one. Ask friends and family that you know have been to counseling, they may can recommend someone. You can also look on the internet, a lot of patients will leave feed back on what they thought about the counselor.
Once you find one you think you both like then you make an appointment, and be sure to keep that appointment it is very important that you go. Without help from a marriage counselor your marriage is going to fall apart right in front of you and you wont be able to stop it.
You will be asked a lot of personal questions that you may feel uncomfortable answering like questions about your sex life, and your relationship but you have to be honest with your answers or the therapist can't help you. If one of you had an affair it needs to be talked about even if the spouse doesn't know. This is the best place to talk about something like that.
You can feel free to say anything you want to your spouse while in the office, it is actually healthy to be able to say everything you keep in all the time. Your therapist will probably give you some homework to do between visits. Things like write each other a letter telling each other how it makes you feel when they do certain things.
The therapist may ask you to use certain words when expressing your feelings. Instead of yelling and screaming at each other use words like I feel, and it hurts when you do this or that. The way you talk to your spouse makes a big difference in a relationship.
A couple that has been married for twenty years or more didn't get that far by talking ugly to each other or yelling. They probably talk to each other with kindness and respect and they listen to one another when one of them is angry about something.
You do not have to yell to be heard. You can be upset and still be heard without screaming at each other. If you do what the counselor tells you to do while you are at home, you may just be able to salvage the relationship. You will have to work at it but don't you think it is worth working for? You have to remember what made you fall in love in the first place. You want to get to that place again, you want to fall in love with you spouse again and you can do that if you work at it.